The “roaches” are the undesirable abusive types and tend to cause an icky feeling whenever they appear across my path. This is not a judgement that people are in fact roaches (Sorry, so sorry! I swear that I’m not some horrible terrorist in Africa!), but I choose this particular insect because that’s the most icky bug that I can think of, that brings out my girlish screams. And trust me, it takes a lot of effort to do that, as I’m not easily squeamish! Proof of that some other time. :-P
I thought about using “spiders” for this metaphor, but in spite of some spiders being deadly and poisonous, they have an appeal to some and are easily romanticized. I wanted to choose an insect that no one likes, or at least the people I know don’t like roaches. O_o
Anyway, my overall point is that the abusive types tend to give me that same kind of skin-crawly feeling I get when I see roaches and I wish to avoid them all together. >_<
However, in life it can’t be helped but to meet icky people, so I must learn how to not mistake them for butterflies. I’m working hard on that! And, it’s true that I can learn valuable lessons from the negative people who cross my path, but it’s not a good idea to purposely go looking for or to entertain them.
In this metaphor, the butterflies are the beautiful people that flutter into my journey’s path. They are artful, very diverse in their shapes and designs, delicate in spirit. These are people I can learn from and I feel at ease in their presence. Although they are not always meant to flutter around me forever, just for a little while.
I’ve been surrounded by icky people most of my life, with so few butterflies along my path. Unfortunately, the moment I wasn’t infested with pests and a butterfly came along, I always seemed to cling onto the beautiful creature a little too much and for far too long.
What I didn’t understand in, my desperation to keep the fun times going forever, is that these butterflies weren’t suppose to stay with me indefinitely. I placed my expectations way too high, believing that I would keep these butterflies with me until the end of my days. And when the butterflies flew away, I felt so devastated, abandoned, heartbroken, and lost.
Somehow I thought it was my fault, because I didn’t fight hard enough to force them to stay, so I began constructing jars to trap any butterfly that crossed my path. However, before I went too far and actually imprisoned kindness, I realized how stupid I was becoming.
I realized that the butterflies weren’t meant to stay with me forever, that they were only there by grace to give me hope, encouragement, kindness, friendship, and information for a small part of my trip. It wouldn’t be right for me to reward their kindness by trapping them in a glass prison or to hold onto them so tightly that I crush them in my hands.
And when I realized that the butterflies weren’t meant to stay, I stopped trying to trap them and watched as they fluttered away. I felt a lot sad. It’s hard to say goodbye to good people, but sometimes that’s the way it’s suppose to work. I will be okay and I will meet other butterflies along the way.
I think what I’ve learned the most is that friendship can be forever within my heart, within my memories, and within the actions I take with the new knowledge a person has left behind for me. I use to believe that “friendship forever” meant the actual presence of that person until the very end of my journey. And that if a person left my path, as they should or was meant to, it meant that the friendship was over for good.
However, I realized that it’s more common that people need to flutter through different stages in their lives and that two people can’t always travel that same bit of path together. Sometimes, in order for two friends to grow, they must part for a while and perhaps meet up again later down the road. And sometimes they may never meet up again at all.
Life is funny with it’s many twists and turns in the road. Not everyone is traveling in the same direction or is meant to arrive at the same town in the end. Sometimes I meet butterflies or other travelers on my journey, but the fact is not all of the time will I wind up with them at journey’s end.
It doesn’t mean that the friendship is lost or what I’ve learned from those kind spirits is any less valuable now that they’re traveling somewhere out of view. No. It just means that I am moving forward on my path and on the way I’ve met some really cool people who will live within my happy memories for the rest of my life.
Maybe someday I will meet up with a few old friends again, once I’ve done my long and sometimes really difficult journey. So, I will try not to be too sad and I am thankful of the time that was given to us.
This is written for the memories of my past friendships. For Phillip, Summer and the old gang of “The Sims Online”, the many kind people I’ve met on “EP”, and anyone else I may have neglected to mention. May we all meet up again someday. If not, I wish you all a very wonderful, safe, and peaceful journey through life. Perhaps we will meet again in another life. ^_^