Happiness Is…

Picture: Hatsune Miku smile.I’m still in the middle of creating an awesome RPG Maker game, however, I’ve realized I haven’t stopped in a while to blog. Oops!

So, today, I’ve decided to take a moment and share what I feel is true happiness in my life, thus far. ^_^

Keep in mind, this is what happiness means to me personally. It’s not a dictation of what happiness should be for everyone else, as it’s different for different people. Without further ado, here’s my little list within my “Quest For Happiness”.

“Happiness is…”

1.) Resting peacefully – It’s rare that I lie my head down on my pillow, with turmoil in my heart or mind, anymore. When I choose to sleep at night (or day, as a lifetime night-owl, I tend to keep odd hours), I’m usually at peace and sleep is just a part of a natural function for me. This wasn’t always the case, as I used to cry myself to sleep or collapse into it so very emotionally drained. It’s nice to visit dreamland without burden. I enjoy my eight or nine hours of sleep until it’s time to open my eyes again.

2.) Opening my eyes again – Besides the fact that I’m alive and get to face another wonderful day of living, the best part of opening my eyes after sleep is the fact that I can see! No longer do I have to worry about running into walls or doors, or stumbling down stairs. I love it when I can turn on my computer in the early mornings (or 2am, most times) and simply read my emails or read today’s science articles without assistance. This was not possible for three years, before my corneal transplant, not at all. I enjoy the confidence of being able to read anything from a book, magazine, online article, or medical release forms. This makes me feel very happy!

3.) Creativity and Learning – Although, I would argue that both concepts are not necessarily exclusive from each other. I am writing and coding video games, which takes a lot of creativity and imagination. However, I’m often learning new gaming mechanics and styles in the process. It’s just too much fun when I run across a new code or feature that I can implement into my project. The best reward is when I have a great idea for a scene, yet I’m unsure how to create it with the coding I’ve already learned, then I work tirelessly for a few hours to figure it out and thus learning something new altogether. It’s beyond awesome!

4.) Self Esteem – I will admit that for most of my life, I had lacked self-esteem. There was always some other person trying to convince me that who I am as a person is wrong or it needs to be “fixed”. I am who I am, I like me, and I believe that I’m awesome. I’m not perfect, no one on this planet is, those who claim it or either lying or lying to themselves. However, I’m not a bad woman, and I’m a wonderful well-rounded individual.  I honestly cannot be bothered with those who may not like nor accept me for who I am.

5.) Meeting new people – I’ve met so many new cool people over the following years. Not everyone is meant to be my new “BFF” or whatever, but I so do enjoy chatting with interesting new people and sharing thoughts/ideas. It’s a joy to meet fellow science nerds , video gamers, or anime geeks. It makes me smile! ^_^

6.) Spending time with true friends – I happen to have a very awesome roommate and the best sister on the planet. I enjoy hanging out and going to the cinema with them. I enjoy visiting Mrs. Mary’s salon, every month, to chat with her and to get an awesome haircut. I appreciate the help, encouragement, and support of my therapist, who feels more like a friend than anything else. Yes, she sometimes feels like a real mother to me as well, because she often nags me in the right direction. Heehee! She worries about any medical procedure I may have to face (she was a huge support before and after my eye surgery) and asks eagerly, “How did it go?”.

Spending time with people who I don’t doubt for a second care about me and will cover my six, and I will and do cover theirs, renews my spirit and affords me great happiness.

Picture: Happy Spinning Girl.

This is my list thus far, however, I don’t plan to stop there. I wish to try more things, experience more, and learn more. However, what I’ve learned in my journey thus far is, true happiness is not a thing that one can passively sit idly by and wish for. It takes effort and hard work to gain it. Most of all, it cannot be a thing achieved when one is weighed down by toxic people: those who put you down or others, are always negative, and bring nothing but drama in your life.

Toxic people are not fit to be in my life, whatsoever, and I don’t abide them anymore. I don’t believe I would have achieved my level of happiness if I had continued to hold onto such people.

Anyhoo… I’ll bugger off once again, to become lost in coding and such. Today’s song is: Au5 – Guardians. As always, thanks for reading dear readers! I wish you a very awesome day! ^o^v

-D

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