Tag Archives: writing

Surviving Politics

Picture: anime blue haired girl
Yuumei.deviantart.com

Hey, dear readers. ^_^

I had hoped to avoid the orange elephant in the room for as long as possible, ever since the November 2016 US Election. This is a blog about finding happiness and there’s hardly any happiness to be found within politics. Especially with the recent drop in my country’s democracies, freedoms, and overall morality under the helm of the current Administration.

First of all, I’d like to explain that I’m neither Republican or Democrat. I’m Independent and a casual observer of politics, and have voted in the last three elections, which includes 2016. I’ve been an Independent ever since the Bush Administration. I’ve written letters of complaint and concerns of my community to Bill Clinton, George W. Bush, and Barack Obama in the past. I’m not interested in political teams, but in fairness for the majority of American citizens and upholding our US Constitution and freedoms for ALL.

And, unfortunately, calling out this current Administration in any way causes its supporters/fans to go wild with indignation. The keyboard warriors in support of “Dear Leader” are often poorly educated people that have learned a logical fallacy term, in “Word Of The Day”-like fashion: Ad Hominem. They honestly argue, “You’ve used an Ad Hominem! That means your point is invalid! You’ve just opted out of the argument! Bahahaha!” and rally-cry this to ad nauseam. Hmm.

The problem with their argument is, that the Electoral College appointed POTUS is the King of Ad Hominem, so they’ve just “logic” themselves into a corner of making the argument that most of what this current Administration says is invalid and he has opted out of America’s and the rest of the world’s discussions and debates.

And I can’t help but agree with that notion, to be honest, as most of what the current POTUS says is invalid or devoid of any reality or sanity. Yes, he has opted out of any discussions held by the majority of American citizens or any discussions held by other countries or allies with America. He has deemed anything that he doesn’t agree with as “Fake news!” However, he’s not simply inept because he uses insults in his arguments, it’s because he uses lies and alternative facts/reality to further his own greedy agendas.

Since the supporters/fans of the current Administration insist on making Ad Hominem into an internet meme, rather than use the term correctly in debates and learn the other logical fallacies that accompany it (Here’s a good one, for example, The Fallacy Fallacy), I shall respond with an internet meme in return. Cue in Zoidberg!

Picture: Zoidberg Meme

 

“Your Administration is bad! And you should feel bad!”

 

However, this is not a post meant to rehash over the political nightmare of America, but a reason to share my list of how I try to retain my happiness within a country hijacked by a minority base of deplorable types and insanity. I hope this list can be helpful to the MAJORITY of Americans who can honestly respond to my ramblings with “I feel you, dawg”. ^_^

Step One: I’m on a 96% political and news media blackout. Six months into following every news update and vile tweet, I noticed that my mental health was declining rapidly. My depression and anxiety issues were soaring to the max, which concerned my therapist and myself.

So, I opted out of following the news and avoid clicking politically charged headlines online. I will check in from time to time, mostly for updates of Special Council Robert Mueller’s findings, but my political consumption is down to few reports once every couple of weeks or so.

In the meanwhile, I’ve tasked my family and friends to alert me of important things in the news. Such as current natural disasters, the death of artists, important community events, and so on. Or to alert me of a moment when America is at war with North Korea, China, Russia, Mexico… *takes a breath* The Middle East, The UK, India, Japan, Germany, South America, France, Australia, Isreal, Canada, Africa… Whew… At this point, I think our POTUS is just knocking at every door, in a sing-song, “Will you come outside and play war with me? PLEASE???” ;u_u

Step Two: I focus on my own health goals. Although my corneal transplant has been a huge success, I have other health issues to work on, a few other surgeries I must face (removing non-cancerous tumors) and feeling okay within my own body. I bought a Mi-fit (discount Fitbit) to work on my daily steps and started a new healthy diet, in an attempt to gain a model’s figure… Nah! Not really, but it couldn’t hurt for me to lose thirty pounds. And, I’ve been 221 Days without a cigarette! ^o^/

Step Three: Learn new things! My favorite topic is SCIENCE! However, I try to keep a keen eye open for other data, like world history, music production, game developing, or simply learning about another culture and lifestyle outside of my own. I sometimes delve into philosophy with my best friend or learn a new word in another language. It’s nice to stay educated and to keep learning.

Step Four: To have fun and to be silly! I enjoy long sessions of laughter with my sister and best friend, trading jokes or witty retorts for hours. I enjoy funny videos online and comedy shows. And adding a bit of humor to my blog posts.

Wink! ^_-

Memes can be a lot of fun to share with friends! I’m memelord trash, by the way, and I claim it with a sense of pride as well. Yes, I allow myself to be childish sometimes, staying up late to play a video game or binge-watching Netflix (I definitely suggest “Bates Motel”, it’s completely binge-worthy!). To quote a famous Doctor, “There’s no point being a grown-up if you can’t be childish sometimes.”

Step Five: ??? Profit! (Sorry! I just had to! ^o^/)

Step Six: Following my passions! And for me, personally, that means writing. I’m currently writing a romance/erotica series that I started in the spring of 2017, a full 90,000+ word novel each. I’m writing book number four, as of yet. I’m not sure if I’ll publish the series or not, I wrote it for my own enjoyment. However, if I do decide to publish the novels, I’ll most likely send it to Harlequin Books for review or something along those lines.

The point is, I’ve decided to spend my time immersed in something wholeheartedly enjoyable and passionate to me, rather than to focus too much on the negative going-ons in my country of late. And it has worked wonders in keeping my depression and anxiety levels low to moderate.

Picture: Anime girl traveling.

I’ll definitely vote again in the next elections, for whatever worth that will do but, for now, I’ve chosen to ignore a rather boisterous and oppressive regime, to stay calm and carry on with my quest for happiness.

Song for today’s post: Furious 2 by Niklas Gustavsson.

Thanks for reading my usual ramblings, as always! Be excellent to each other and take care! ^o^/

– D

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Life Is An Adventure!

Picture: Blue haired anime girl.Hello, my wonderful readers! ^o^/

Yes, I’m still very much alive and happy. For now, at least, before my country gets wiped off the map by a nuclear blast from Korea or Russia! Hooray!

I’m kidding. It’s just a joke. Maybe. Hopefully… o_o

Anyhoo, I realized that I haven’t left a post here for two whole months and I happen to have a rambling thought on my mind, so… Don’t worry, it’s not political but life stuff. ^_^

I’ve realized that people are a bit confused about my interests in life. I love to study physics with the wish of becoming a scientist someday. I love to write novels with the wish of becoming a great writer someday. I’m currently writing a script and coding for an app game, with excellent input from my best friend, and the wish of becoming a great video game developer someday.

And so people often wonder, “Which is it, Dani? Do you want to be a scientist, a writer, or a video game developer?” My honest answer is, “All of the above. Or just one. Or a combination of two. We shall see!” ^_^

Oh, please don’t be surprised if “music artist” (mixing dubstep) or “juggler” wind up in the list in the future. I shall explain my madness…

I’ve decided that I will honestly follow my interests in life and see how far they will take me. I’m highly driven in writing, video games, and science. These are the big three in my life. I’ve had a passion for them, ever since I was a little girl, and I have some talent in each.

I’ve decided that life is an adventure, it’s supposed to be lived and not spectated. I can’t cram myself into one little box or career goal at this point. So, I’m enjoying everything and trying my hand at new skills and experiences overall.

And this honestly makes me feel happy. I wake up every day with a sense of adventure of, “What project will I do next?” ᕕ( ᐛ )ᕗ

So… that’s what I’ve been up to lately, living a “wild” adventure, working on many different projects, and enjoying every waking moment in writing, coding, and studying science.

I have one life lesson that I’ve learned thus far, that I will share with the rest of the class – It doesn’t matter what others may think about my odd choices in life. What matters more is that I’m happy, healthy, and content within my life. And I’m SO AM!

I shall never let anyone try to dictate to me how I should live my own life, what I should follow or not follow, what should be my focus or not. As long as I’m not harming anyone or myself, I will try out everything that comes across my path and make up my own mind of what gets to stay in my life or not stay.

And yes, I will make mistakes but they will be my own mistakes, not ones caused by following someone else’s script. I will discover my own ways and habits, to not be indoctrinated into other people’s ways or habits without question. And most of all, I will live the way I always wanted to live, as Dani.

I think this what growing up and being an adult is all about. ^_^

Anyway… here’s a health update – I’ve been cigarette free for seventy-four days and counting! Huzzah! ^o^/

Picture: blue haired goth girl.

Alright, now I shall bugger off and get back to my scripts and science educations. Today’s song is: OMFG – Pancakes. Be excellent to each other, my wonderful readers, and thanks for reading as always! ^_^v

-D

Happiness Is…

Picture: Hatsune Miku smile.I’m still in the middle of creating an awesome RPG Maker game, however, I’ve realized I haven’t stopped in a while to blog. Oops!

So, today, I’ve decided to take a moment and share what I feel is true happiness in my life, thus far. ^_^

Keep in mind, this is what happiness means to me personally. It’s not a dictation of what happiness should be for everyone else, as it’s different for different people. Without further ado, here’s my little list within my “Quest For Happiness”.

“Happiness is…”

1.) Resting peacefully – It’s rare that I lie my head down on my pillow, with turmoil in my heart or mind, anymore. When I choose to sleep at night (or day, as a lifetime night-owl, I tend to keep odd hours), I’m usually at peace and sleep is just a part of a natural function for me. This wasn’t always the case, as I used to cry myself to sleep or collapse into it so very emotionally drained. It’s nice to visit dreamland without burden. I enjoy my eight or nine hours of sleep until it’s time to open my eyes again.

2.) Opening my eyes again – Besides the fact that I’m alive and get to face another wonderful day of living, the best part of opening my eyes after sleep is the fact that I can see! No longer do I have to worry about running into walls or doors, or stumbling down stairs. I love it when I can turn on my computer in the early mornings (or 2am, most times) and simply read my emails or read today’s science articles without assistance. This was not possible for three years, before my corneal transplant, not at all. I enjoy the confidence of being able to read anything from a book, magazine, online article, or medical release forms. This makes me feel very happy!

3.) Creativity and Learning – Although, I would argue that both concepts are not necessarily exclusive from each other. I am writing and coding video games, which takes a lot of creativity and imagination. However, I’m often learning new gaming mechanics and styles in the process. It’s just too much fun when I run across a new code or feature that I can implement into my project. The best reward is when I have a great idea for a scene, yet I’m unsure how to create it with the coding I’ve already learned, then I work tirelessly for a few hours to figure it out and thus learning something new altogether. It’s beyond awesome!

4.) Self Esteem – I will admit that for most of my life, I had lacked self-esteem. There was always some other person trying to convince me that who I am as a person is wrong or it needs to be “fixed”. I am who I am, I like me, and I believe that I’m awesome. I’m not perfect, no one on this planet is, those who claim it or either lying or lying to themselves. However, I’m not a bad woman, and I’m a wonderful well-rounded individual.  I honestly cannot be bothered with those who may not like nor accept me for who I am.

5.) Meeting new people – I’ve met so many new cool people over the following years. Not everyone is meant to be my new “BFF” or whatever, but I so do enjoy chatting with interesting new people and sharing thoughts/ideas. It’s a joy to meet fellow science nerds , video gamers, or anime geeks. It makes me smile! ^_^

6.) Spending time with true friends – I happen to have a very awesome roommate and the best sister on the planet. I enjoy hanging out and going to the cinema with them. I enjoy visiting Mrs. Mary’s salon, every month, to chat with her and to get an awesome haircut. I appreciate the help, encouragement, and support of my therapist, who feels more like a friend than anything else. Yes, she sometimes feels like a real mother to me as well, because she often nags me in the right direction. Heehee! She worries about any medical procedure I may have to face (she was a huge support before and after my eye surgery) and asks eagerly, “How did it go?”.

Spending time with people who I don’t doubt for a second care about me and will cover my six, and I will and do cover theirs, renews my spirit and affords me great happiness.

Picture: Happy Spinning Girl.

This is my list thus far, however, I don’t plan to stop there. I wish to try more things, experience more, and learn more. However, what I’ve learned in my journey thus far is, true happiness is not a thing that one can passively sit idly by and wish for. It takes effort and hard work to gain it. Most of all, it cannot be a thing achieved when one is weighed down by toxic people: those who put you down or others, are always negative, and bring nothing but drama in your life.

Toxic people are not fit to be in my life, whatsoever, and I don’t abide them anymore. I don’t believe I would have achieved my level of happiness if I had continued to hold onto such people.

Anyhoo… I’ll bugger off once again, to become lost in coding and such. Today’s song is: Au5 – Guardians. As always, thanks for reading dear readers! I wish you a very awesome day! ^o^v

-D

Writing Video Games: Pt 2!

your-diary-enomoto-kaho-minagawa-yuuhi-girls-playing-video-games-wooden-floor-sitting-room-anime-1920x1080In 2015, I had purchased a program called “RPG Maker VX Ace” and dabbled a bit in creating video games. I’ve started and stopped six titles, never finishing a single one. I guess, I got bored halfway through creating these games and simply forgot to return to them.

However, some weeks ago, I was inspired to create an RPG Maker game to show my appreciation for a YouTuber named LordMinion777, aka: Wade. I’ve turned to his and another YouTuber’s videos (Jacksepticeye) the most during my keratoplasty recovery, which helped to keep my spirits up!

I have noticed that Wade doesn’t get many fan games in general, so I figured that I could make him an awesome game. I wasn’t sure if I would actually complete the game, but I did! My play-tester (sister) and a few others who’ve tried out the final product have remarked that they did enjoy the game! Hooray! ^o^v

I have sent the game to Wade, but haven’t heard anything back from him yet, if ever. The important thing is, that I had a lot of fun creating it and I’ve entertained a few. If you’re interested in downloading it, you can do so here: Dropbox – LordM.EXE.

Completing this game has triggered me to attempt another non-fan game. It will take some time to complete, but hopefully I will not lose steam again. ^_-

Picture: anime girls video games.

Today’s song is: Vicetone – Nevada. Thanks for reading, as always! ^_^v

-D

I’m An Essay Writer

holo writingThis is not a surprise to anyone who follow my blog or has earned the misfortune of communicating with me privately in emails. I write essays, pure and simple, and I like to believe that I write them well enough. The topics of my blog ranges from my personal life experiences, to music, science, art, writing, anime, or anything else floating around in my brain at any particular moment.

The fact is, every blogger is an essay writer! I’d thought I would mention that, just in case you didn’t realize it before. ^w^

I do try to dabble as a novelist, however, I seem to gain the most success in writing personal essays. Not just in blogging, but this is the format that I write my therapy homework, emails, and forum posts in as well.

I’m always surprised to find that people are generally more interested in my daily musings or random thoughts, than they are in any of my well thought-out 90,000+ word fictional manuscripts. I’m very curious about why that is so, however this fact  alone is very flattering and humbling at the same time.

I don’t view myself to be very interesting – very complicated and eccentric, yes, but not all that impressive as a human being. So, I feel a lot puzzled as to why my subscriber count of this blog is 57 currently, when I simply write and share random thoughts in essay form. Does it really matter what I think about… well, anything?

I’m just one person among over 7 billion people on the planet. I haven’t cured cancer or done anything remotely brilliant to solve the world’s problems. I’m just one ordinary woman who’s trying her best to find happiness and her true place in this world. And I haven’t solved that equation, not by a long shot.

However, I do notice that my therapist seems to love my homework essays, and she seems to believe that I’m a great writer because of them. Granted, she’s never read any of my fictional works and her judgement is completely based on my essays, however it’s still a lot confusing to me that people enjoy my little rambles and random thoughts so much.

Confusing, but flattering all the same. I must be honest and confess that I do enjoy the compliments and it does encourages me to share more.

animethinkingI have been seeing my therapist for over two years now, and I have written fifteen (four to six pages each) single spaced essays for homework over the years. Many are painful accounts of my past, some are about which goals I wish to reach in the future, and every single one of them are raw expressions of what I truly think, feel, fear, want, or need.I guess the same can be said of this blog, in a way…

Although, I tend to edit and mull over my blogs before hitting the “publish” button. With my therapy essays, I don’t think about it, I just select “print” and bring the pages with me to my sessions.

It’s highly fascinating to me that my rambles are entertaining to others and sometimes aspiring (as this claim was made to me a few times).

However, I kind of understand the appeal a little, as I tend to watch/read many essays online by others.Today, I have enjoyed a video essay by “Nerdwriter1”: All Along The Watchtower, Explored. And I’m currently in the middle of reading Stephen King’s essay titled: Guns. It’s a very good essay at that!

I care to read, watch, and follow the essays of others for the sheer fact that I’m constantly seeking new information or a different point of view to ponder. I comment rarely, but when I do so, it because I’m hoping the author will expound further on their view. Either that, I’m just leaving well wishes or encouragement, in appreciation of the author affording me a new perspective to mull over.

And yet, it still alludes me as to why my scribbles would be any interest to anyone, besides to those closest to me. Really, I’m not that interesting! And god forbid if anyone actually takes any of my self-advice (“lessons”) to heart for themselves! My life is just one huge experiment, so my “lessons” aren’t proven or disproved just yet. It’s just an alpha-version of a thought! o_O

fruitsbasketshigure

Anyway… as always, thanks for reading! Have a good day, everyone! ^_*v

-D

The Art Of Role-Playing!

Picture: anime girl surfing web.In the nineties, I loved to join role-playing groups on “Geocities” forums! This primitive format was rife with such groups, where people could come together and role-play characters in a collective storytelling activity. It was a little like D&D (Dungeons And Dragons), except without casting of a die and a lot more free-roaming without many rules. Some groups were themed after popular shows or movies, while others were simply made up medieval worlds.

After a while of joining others’ groups, I decided to create a few of my own, which included one “Men In Black” and “Buffy The Vampire Slayer/Angel” RPG. It was a very creative experience that added much to my skills of writing for opposite genders and action scenes.

In the Buffy RPG, I role-played the characters of Wesley Wyndam-Price and Angel. Other members held the role of Charles Gunn, Buffy, Willow, Dawn, Spike, Lorne, Xander, etc. In these groups, gender was never an issue, people earned the roles for portraying the characters the best. For example, in my group, the role of Spike was played by a very talented woman who got his character “just right” above any other member of the group. No one questioned my roles of Wesley or Angel, as I portrayed the characters very well (because they were my fan-girl favorites, of course!).

The forum lasted for almost a month, until real-life obligations (work and school) interrupted the schedules to meet online and the group faded away. However, it was a very fun experience, well before cosplay (costume play) and solo fan-fiction writing became a more popular thing to do in these modern times.

However, I look back in memory to my old times in RPG groups and smile. Yes, it was very dorky and sometimes a little silly, but we had tons of fun together. And it was a great exercise that lead to my current style of writing today.

I’m not sure if such online groups are still around these days, but if they were, I think I would enjoy a Doctor Who RPG. I’d make for a brilliant Tenth Doctor! ^o^/

Picture: Doctor Who - The Tenth Doctor.
My actual chosen desktop wallpaper, btw…

Song of today: The Doctor’s Theme. Thanks for reading! ^_^v

-D

Microblogging Musings!

Picture: Sassy anime girl.This is a very short blog post, about my decision to try “mircoblogging”. Heehee! ^o^v

I usually post within my blog sporadically, without a clear schedule or aim, with at least close to 2,000 words per post. My posts are usually focused on topics that are dominate within my mind, at any particular point in time. Or I share my personal experiences in life. However, due to time restraints, I tend to only post on the rare occasions that I can comfortably scribble out and edit an essay on a direct topic.

This is fine for me, but sometimes I have random ideas or thoughts that I wish to share and they are “too short” for a proper blog post and much too long for a Facebook status. And Twitter, with its 240 character cap… forget about it! >_>

So, I believe that I do have enough random thoughts to fill up this new category of “Musings”. This means, I may blog a bit more often, fair warning!

I guess my type of microblogging is best suited for Tumblr, however I do not care much for that site. It’s a bit too far left liberal for me, not that I think that’s a bad thing, it’s just not for me personally. I’m a strong middle-road type of gal. Twitter is an awesome site for my type of personality, however the character limit leaves me no choice but to blog elsewhere and attach the link to a tweet. Or to just post lots of links to science or political subjects that I agree with. And, of course, sharing music links! ^w^

This will be something new for me to try, to limit my rambling thoughts to no more than 400 words or less. I will still post the long essays as usual, don’t worry! I’m just adding a bit of random color to my blogging habits, is all.

Happy blogging, everyone! And thanks for reading as usual! ^_^v

Picture: space kitty.

Yay, my first 336 word post! Here’s a music link: Au5 – Atlantis.

-D